1. You have a table you can't set anything on, a floor that can't get dirty, a yard you can't sit in, and shoes you can't walk in.
2. You buy fake snow to spray on your windows, then complain when it actually snows a couple inches.
3. Even the yogurt is not vegetarian.
4. Your passport is useless, but your entire life hinges around your Driver's License.
5. People offer to "give you a ride to your car."
6. Small is Medium, Medium is Large, and Large is Jumbo.
...more to come....
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